For many months, or probably years, I had been listening to sermons on suffering. While listening to them, I found myself counting my blessings. Most of these sermons are tied to life events such as illness, the death of a loved one, parenting children who have strayed from the church or their own faith, depression, anxiety, etc...Upon hearing many of these lessons from the pulpit, I found empathy for individuals close to me experiencing these trials, and while I was praying for them, I was also thanking God. I have three amazing children that all profess belief in Christ. They know their Rock
and Redeemer. I have a loving husband, a good job, and no immediate health problems. To say that I am thankful for these things may seem trite to some, a word that is perhaps overused along with blessings, but oh so true. These are things often taken for granted. Full disclosure, though, I also found myself saying "When is my time coming?" Things are going too well.
And so begins my story of the summer and fall of 2019. My own season of suffering, of sort. I will write my thoughts based on the days because that seems the best method of recall for me. It also allows me to think back on each event and reflect before I move forward to the next season of watching what God has in store for us.
Somewhere around June 4th, 2019 I have a mammogram. This is no big deal to me. I have been going every year since I turned 30. My mom passed away from breast cancer at the age of 43, but was diagnosed in her 30's, so I am high risk. Through each year, I have received one callback. It was nothing, so when I get a call back for a second mammogram this time, I am not worried at all and don't even give it a second thought.
June 17, 2019 I have an appointment with Dr. Alicia Glass, OB/GYN. This will be my first visit with her as my regular OB Dr. Gordon Bryars passed away back in October of 2018, so I am nervous. Due to his medical leave of absence, I am a little behind on my GYN appointments. She is very sweet, sincere, and calm and reminds me that tomorrow I have a mammo and will get the results at the end of the week. My cervix, however, looks great! Again, I am not concerned.
Meanwhile...I have been looking for a job in Birmingham. Lowell has driven that commute for seven and a half long years and I have watched the drive wear on him. My children are all out of the nest, at least for the most part except for Hannah who is away at college. Special Education is a field that is always looking for teachers, so I have been applying for a few months. I have two interviews on June 18th, but tell myself these will be the last and if nothing comes of them, I will stay in Tuscaloosa. There is nothing on the line. I am happy in my current position at TCTA but am not opposed to change if the Lord opens that door.
June 19, 2019 Dr. Kristi Sayers contacts me to offer the job at Oak Mountain High School. I am surprised. I thought I blew that interview for sure when I answered that I wanted to have my own classroom, and this position is for Inclusion, which basically means co-teaching for those of you not in tune with education terms. I accept the job!!
A few days later, Dr. Glass calls to tell me that there is something wrong on my mammogram. There is a suspicious cell on my left breast. She is referring me to a surgeon. I take the first available, since I don't have a preferred doctor. This is all new to me. That happens to be Dr. Gross, and I have an appointment with him on July 10th.
June 21, 2019 we celebrate Lowell's 55th birthday!!
June 23, 2019 Lowell and I leave for our planned two week anniversary trip. 30 years!! We travel to Gatlinburg, TN; Niagra Falls, NY; and Lake Placid, NY.
June 28, 2019, while in Lake Placid I receive a text from my step mom Barbara. Dad is not doing well in the residential facility. He has stopped eating and drinking. The nurses say that is a tell tale sign of the ending stages of dementia. Barbara will call Hospice to come and care for him at Whitesburg Gardens going forward.
I respond to let her know that we are praying for him to begin eating again and that he will not get any type of infection.
Saturday June 29, 2019 the Hospice evaluation is that my dad may have 10 days or less to live. I receive this text during lunch atop Whiteface Mountain in New York. Lowell and I will check out in the morning from the lovely Golden Arrow Resort and make the two day trip to Huntsville. It is important to us to help and support Barbara. Half of a vacation is better than no vacation. Acadia National Park and the Boston area are not going anywhere, so we will attempt to visit again sometime. This glass is still half full.
Sunday, June 30th, 2019, my dad turned 86 years old. I believe he slept through this birthday. He doesn't appear to be in any pain according to Barbara. Praise God for that.
